FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
