she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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