after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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