U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize