Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Randomize
