Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
