Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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