All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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