somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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