All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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