Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
