I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Randomize