Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(702): View more from Nevada

She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.

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(817): View more from Texas

Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.

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(559): View more from California

The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.

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(817): View more from Texas

I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.

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(330): View more from Ohio

If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?

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(719): View more from Colorado

I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry

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(301): View more from Maryland

Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?

(301): View more from Maryland

PS: I think I'm in love

(301): View more from Maryland

Ability to walk tomorrow tbd

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