I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
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