Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
We talked him into tasing himself.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
