oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
