i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
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she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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