Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
