No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
