why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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