at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
