do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I checked into jail on foursquare
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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