return my video game
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
