i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.