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• (703): View more from Virginia

  His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN

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• (904): View more from Florida

  watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..

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  These 23 Kids Have The Most Overbearing Parents Imaginable

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (732): View more from New Jersey

  Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.

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• (905): View more from Ontario

  I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers

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• (712): View more from Iowa

  Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.

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  21 People That Are Skilled At Illegal Activities

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• (514): View more from Quebec

  It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary

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• (707): View more from California

  Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK

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• (434): View more from Virginia

  I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.

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• (385): View more from Utah

  I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina

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