My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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