just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize