i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Randomize