Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
