if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
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