It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize