hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
