ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
handjob tips. give me some.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
