My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize