I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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