somebody snuck up and got me drunk
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize