He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
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