So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
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