This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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