I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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