Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
