Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
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