I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
