just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
