just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.