I swear she didn't look like that last week.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
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