Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
