you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
