once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Randomize
