you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
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