im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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